Hello Darkness, My Old Friend

Monday, April 29, 2013

I've come to talk with you again. Once again, it's about 4 am and I am WIDE AWAKE, this time, courtesy of pseudoephedrine. Once again, song lyrics and music fill my brain. I have always loved Simon and Garfunkel, ever since I was a little girl. Some of my first memories of music are of my dad listening to Simon and Garfunkel tapes, and when I was about 6, he made me a mix tape (old school!) with tons of Simon and Garfunkel, Cat Stevens (before he was Yusef Islam), and a lot of other stuff. I played that tape until it died, and kept it for longer after that. 

Anyway, here I am, sitting in bed, listening to the sound of silence (literally). I have been battling what in thought was allergies since Thursday evening, but it has seemed to declare itself as some kind of virus. Worst sore throat of my life, exhaustion, malaise, headache, some low fevers, and joint pain. I'm sure some of those symptoms are whatever the hell autoimmune disease I have complicating things. 

I spent the weekend hanging out, relaxing, and babysitting in the very swanky Rittenhouse Hotel on Saturday and Sunday nights. The job was super easy and involved sitting in a hotel room with a sleeping 10 month old on Saturday, and sitting in a hotel room with a sleeping 10 month old (who screamed in my ear for a bit when his momma left), and then a sleeping 2 year old (who fell asleep listening to Coldplay and kept adorably requesting "Scientist" on repeat... good thing I love that song). I had a 5 year old for a bit both nights, but he just laid in bed and played Angry Birds on my Kindle and requested stories about my cats, which is great because I love telling cat stories and most of the time, people think I am crazy when I tell them. (5 year olds don't judge.)

And now the work week is upon us. I contemplated staying home tomorrow, but since I am going to feel disgusting no matter where I am, I might as well go to work. Fortunately, I don't have any meetings or obligations tomorrow, so I can stay in my office (with a door!), drink tea/coffee, and try to move as little as possible. 

I am seeing my rheumatologist tomorrow, so hopefully if there is something to be done about this mess in my sinuses/throat, I can get that taken care of. I am bummed because I just got a letter telling me that my doc is leaving the practice in July. They're replacing her, but I really liked her because she actually gave a crap and listened to me and tried a treatment, despite my inconclusive lab results. If she's staying local, I may follow her. We shall see.\

Anyway... I am going to try and get some sleep... or contemplate life, the universe, and everything. Either one.
- A

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